A Chapter For My Life

“My plan to implement one chapter in my life.” – Dr. North

How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie is a powerful book with a lot of helpful information. I think it is a book that everyone should read. Anyone can benefit from learning these techniques, but obviously they must be implemented to work.

The chapter I chose is “How to Criticize-and Not Be Hated for It.” The chapter discusses approaching criticism with praise using an indirect approach. This is probably something I would have never thought of on my own. My natural instinct is to say it like it is, especially if I were a boss. I would expect my employees to follow the rules and be courteous. If they were not I would have no problem reminding them of my expectations. I guess the reason I chose this chapter is not because I am afraid to be hated, but it taught me something new. Maybe my way is not the best way.

We are all creatures of habit and we do want to change or find ways of bettering ourselves. Carnegie’s book teaches the art of keeping ourselves open to change and helped me to realize that where I did not think I needed work, perhaps I do.

Dale Carnegie

Now I must figure out how to implement this into my life. I guess I could be very conscious of my reactions to smaller situations in everyday life. I will stop myself and think about the situation at hand and follow the advice in the book. The more conscious I am of my words the more natural this behavior will develop. I will try to be creative with the indirect approach spoken of in the book. I like the scenario where the woman needed the construction workers, adding an addition to her house, to clean up after themselves. Instead of getting upset she cleaned it up herself. Then, the next morning, she thanked them politely for keeping the yard respectable for the sake of her neighbors. Her approach worked beautifully, they began to come to her everyday after work to get her approval on the cleanup that they did.

 

Overall the book, as well as the chapter I chose, has taught me a lot about human relations. I am really glad I was assigned this book and would highly recommend it.

 

 

 

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Difficult Technique for Me

“What would be the most difficult technique in this book so far for you to learn how to do well? Why?” – Dr. North

The most difficult technique for me in Dale Carnegie’s book, How to Win Friends and Influence People would be from the chapter “The Secret of Socrates”. I am not sure I would be good at getting a customer with a no attitude to start saying “yes, yes” immediately. Every person that says no is different, and I wonder if I could assess them quickly enough. Now some people will be easily swayed, however others can be rather difficult. I typically would not let someone disrespect me by nature. I know I would have to learn how to be savvy enough to turn the conversation around and lead the customer to an open minded state where they are willing to work towards the best possible outcome for everyone.

 

In this chapter Dale Carnegie gave the example of a banker in New York City who encountered a customer that wanted to open a account but did not want to give the required information needed to do so. The banker, before studying human relations, said that he would have turned the customer away. I probably would have done the same. He realized that was not making the customer feel welcomed or important. He knew he must make the customer feel that the necessary information was needed for his sake, not just the banks. He turned every refusal that the customer was giving him around, and with a positive reasonable question changed the customers mind. This is where I think I might struggle. Would I be good at analyzing the situation in changing their mind without them even realizing what I was doing and that we actually agree. The banker was even able to get the customer to do more than he originally entered the bank for.

I really feel like I am going to need to work on everything that was in this book. Every chapter offered something and should be taken seriously. I guess the one in my paper stood out a little bit more.

He who treads softly goes far.” – Chinese proverb

A Loyalists Point of View of Paine

“Write a critique of Paine’s pamphlets from the point of view of a loyalist in 1778.” – Dr. North

As a Loyalist your message is not one of inspiration but one of anger. Your pamphlets spew rhetoric. It is insulting to the “common sense” of Americans.  Your ideas to sway them of what a government should be is pure hogwash. I believe that you took advantage of your people at a vulnerable time. Your works are based on emotions and not at all factual. You are asking your people to fight in a war that you want. You fill their heads with lies to evoke a rage so powerful bloodshed will surely ensue. You decry Englishmen, calling us liars and tyrants.  I conceive that you are indeed the the liar.

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Thomas Paine’s “Common Sense”

“The most illogical argument in Common Sense asked of me by Dr. North.

Common Sense is a pamphlet written by Thomas Paine in 1776. He presented his argument for why he felt a revolution was necessary. Paine said that his arguments were plain and of a common sense nature. Not so much.

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It became America’s first best seller. I do not know how that managed to happen. More rhetoric was being used than logic. For example he stated that a country should have no debt. He then contradicted himself and said that it should have debt…

“The debt we may contract doth not deserve our regard if the work be but accomplished. No nation ought to be without a debt. A national debt is a national bond; and when it bears no interest, is in no case a grievance. Britain is oppressed with a debt of upwards of one hundred and forty millions sterling, for which she pays upwards of four millions interest. And as a compensation for her debt, she has a large navy; America is without a debt, and without a navy; yet for the twentieth part of the English national debt, could have a navy as large again. The navy of England is not worth, at this time, more than three millions and a half sterling.”

The whole thing for me was, to be honest, humdrum and so hard to get through. It could not keep my attention. 

Using Spreeder

“What would it take for Dr. North to persuade me to use Spreeder for 10 minutes a day?”

This was asked of me by my Business 1 teacher. Spreeder is a website that is used for increasing your reading ability. Helping you read faster and comprehend more.

spreeder

At first I was doing it everyday for the recommended 10 minutes, then I got behind on my writing assignments in December when I had the opportunity to take a holiday vacation on a cruise. When I got back it just got away from me. I actually noticed a difference in my reading since I have not been doing it. I feel like it has slipped a bit. So I guess Dr. North does not need to persuade me, because I do feel guilty and really want to get back to improving my reading. Reading faster will help me be more productive with my reading assignments thereby allowing for better time management.

The holiday season was and still is a major challenge for me. Between vacation and the holiday itself, it really set me behind. It interfered with my sleep schedule, healthy eating habits and working out. These things are important as they help me to stay in focus. I just forgot about Spreeder. It is only 10 minutes a day so there is no excuse for not doing it. Anyone can take 10 minutes out of their day. This will only enforce good habits that can help me in my future endeavors.